october 11, 2012

I have been praying that the right people are placed in Charlie's life at the right time, especially regarding school.  I could do that or I could let the anxiety attacks and feelings of hopelessness take over.  I figured the first option was the better way to go.

I had no idea that the school years were going to be this tough.  And we are only in the second grade. I feel sick to my stomach when I think about going through this for ten more years.  

We are all trying to figure out what is best for Charlie.  That boy.  He is one complex, amazing little person.

Originally his teacher dismissed my concerns because she was only looking at academics.  He is working several years above grade level in many areas and it is easy to focus on that.  I was shut out and told that the school district wouldn't do anything for him unless we got some kind of diagnosis.

Then Charlie had a meltdown at school.  It was a pretty big one.  And although I am not proud of this meltdown, I am happy it happened because the teacher began to wonder if she was missing something.  Then the counselor got involved.  And now we might be a little closer to getting Charlie what he needs at school.

It has been a few weeks and they haven't done anything yet (that I have seen), but I am trying to trust in the process.

Only ten more years.  Deep breaths.

may 25, 2012

We officially have a second grader in the house.  Go Charlie! :)

First Day of 1st Grade:

The last day of 1st Grade:

And shaved ice to celebrate.  Watermelon for Cannon and Cherry Coke for Charlie.

Looking forward to a fun-filled and exciting Summer with these two cute boys.

may 18, 2012

Charlie's first grade program was today and as you can see, he was totally stoked about it.  Let's just say that being up in front of a crowd is not his thing.  Add singing silly songs to that and he is really not interested.  To his credit, he is on the tail end of a bad cold and was still not feeling 100%.  In fact, his teacher had to pull him aside at one point because he was coughing and had a hard time catching his breath.  Poor little dude.

He can hardly wait for school to be out.  We have been counting down for weeks and he is so excited that the days can fit on just one hand.....only five more to go!

january 14, 2012

I love that whenever Charlie is asked what his favorite sport is, his answer is always "bowling".

It also looks like his future goal has upgraded from becoming a Coke truck driver to becoming a ninja and he is now on a first name basis with Justin Beiber.

first grade....

I have a lot to catch up on from the past few months, but today I just want to share Charlie's back to school photos because I just can't get over how grown-up he is getting! sigh.

Even though Charlie wasn't really looking forward to starting school, he seemed pretty excited on his first day. He had to start at yet another new school so I think he may have been a little nervous about everything being new again.

He wasn't too crazy about going full day because it is "such a loooOnnnNG time" but now that he has been a couple days I think he likes it better than he thought he would. When he got home on is first day he said "It was SO boring. I didn't learn one single new thing." Great. I didn't think I was going to get that kind of attitude until the teenage years...

The only other comments we got were to be sure to add less mayo to his sandwich for tomorrow and please add apple sauce instead of a fruit cup. Sounds like lunch and recess are the top priorities at this point.

And in true Cannon fashion, he had to be a part of the whole event. We couldn't find Cannon's backpack from the move and he was devastated. A plastic Target bag had to do and he was proud to drag that thing all the way to school and back.

Looking forward to settling into a new routine and praying for a wonderful school year!

bus update....

Thank-you all so, so much for your comments on our bus fiasco. It is so nice to hear all your thoughts and about your experiences. I feel so new at this "being a mom with a kid in school" thing. I truly have the greatest friends! :)

After chatting with Charlie about the bus, we decided to try to get this thing worked out. He said that he really wants to ride it so I told him we had to make sure it was safe first. I keep thinking about how he wasn't really scared when I found him at the wrong stop. At first I was relieved because I didn't want him to be upset, but then I became concerned that he didn't seem to notice that he was in danger. I don't want him to be scared all the time but I do want him to know when something isn't right. I am trying to figure that part out without making him feel like he should be in fear whenever I am not around.

Anyway, I have had quite a few conversations with the transportation department and the school. I will say that nobody I have spoken with has really shown the level of concern about the situation that I would expect. I was surprised to see this especially after what I have heard from all of you guys that commented about this. Charlie did ride the bus on Thursday and Friday and it went okay. Since there were substitutes both days I just made sure to get ahold of the dispatcher on both days and let them know that Charlie was on the bus and that the driver was not allowed to get off until he saw me at his stop. It went fine and Charlie was happy.

There are still some major concerns that I am sorting through right now though. The bus has been 20-25 minutes late at pick-up and drop-off every time. The school promised they would call me back on Friday with some information and they never did. I am concerned that there is a new substitute driver every day.

At this point I do feel okay about Charlie riding the bus, it has just become a lot more work than I expected. Honestly, I am just so dissapointed with his school and I am currently writing an e-mail to his teacher and principal about my concerns. My problems are more than just the bus situation and I am afraid my fears of sending Charlie to public school may be coming true.

When they say that parenting just keeps getting harder as your kids get older, it is so completely true.

Here is Charlie waiting for the bus on Friday morning.
I was laughing when I uploaded this picture to my computer. I didn't really notice it at the time, but you can see below that Charlie is our little rule follower. I had told him to stay on the sidewalk and he never budged. I am sure he was just dying inside that the other kids were in the street. Not that he wanted to be in the street or anything, but because he is all about safety.

i hate the bus....

We had no problems last year when Charlie rode the bus to preschool. I suppose that is because they picked him up and dropped him off right in front of our building. And they actually arrived when they said they would. So, I didn't even think twice about Charlie riding it again this year. I would rather not deal with all the chaos at the school doing the drop off and pick up.

Yesterday was the first day to ride it. The bus was supposed to come at 7:50 so we got there about 10 minutes early just to be safe. The stop is at the entrance of our community and is definitely too far for Charlie to walk to alone. We waited over 20 minutes and never saw the bus. So I loaded up the kids and drove him to school. I called later that afternoon to find out what happened and was told they changed the pick-up time to 7:36. Thanks for telling us!

Then I go to pick him up yesterday afternoon at 3:15. It was 3:25 and still no bus. I get a call from the school letting me know that Charlie is on the bus, but he freaked out after school and was afraid to get on the bus. She said he was very upset and practically hyperventilating. Poor guy. I was so surprised because he LOVED the bus last year. The bus finally pulls up about 3:40. It was 25 minutes late because of Charlie's little freak out. He is calmed down and looks at me like nothing ever happened.

This morning I make sure to get to the stop by 7:30. I wanted to talk to the driver to be sure there is someone to help the kids when they get off since he probably didn't know where he was going. It is a substitute driver and he doesn't seem to care what I am saying. I load him up on the bus and pray for the best.

This is where I lose it. The bus pulls up this afternoon at 3:20 and I am waiting to see Charlie's spikey-haired little head come down the steps and I don't see him. I walk up and ask the driver where he is. She says "Oh he got off at the last stop, sorry." Um. Are you KIDDING me? I explain that he is only five and he has no idea where to go. She just looks at me and says "Are you going to be okay?". I ran to my car to drive to the previous stop. I am looking around everywhere and I don't see him. I asked the mail carrier if she had seen him and she said a bunch of kids had just gotten off but she didn't know where they went. I continued to drive around another 5 minutes and I am beginning to freak out. Where in the world could he have gone? I call Eric and just as he picks up I see Charlie out of the corner of my eye walking around with another little boy. He is just fine and he calmly says "Hey mom. I couldn't find you." I was so glad that he was not upset. I was worried he was going to be freaking out (like I was!)

I am just so upset and frustrated right now and don't know what to do. I am sure that this will eventually get worked out and it won't continue to be total drama everyday. The regular driver should be back soon and we would get into a routine. But I am not feeling comfortable with this bus system right now and wonder if I should go with my instinct and drive him to school for a while. I don't know. What would you do?

we have a kindergartener in the house...

Well, the day is finally here. Charlie started kindergarten today. He was so ready for this and he woke up very excited this morning. When I went in to wake him up, I told him it was time to get ready for school and he quickly started to shed his pajamas saying "I cannot be late for my very first day of school!" I had originally laid out shorts for him to wear, but it was a chilly morning and we decided to switch to pants.

Cannon is thinking about how he feels about all this school stuff going on....
Nope, he doesn't like it one bit!
Right after taking these photos it began to pour so we ran inside, grabbed some jackets and then headed out to school. He is going to ride the bus normally, but of course I wanted to bring him on his first day.

He quickly found his seat and gave me the thumbs up letting me know that everything was going to be okay. I had expected to be a little more emotional today, but I think I know deep down that he is more than ready for this and he is going to do so great. Makes my mama heart happy.

We were all up and ready, dropped Charlie off, got some groceries and were home by 9am. I am so not used to these early mornings. I am also pretty sure we were the only ones at Walmart under the age of 65. I was thinking I should make it a habit to go so early because the store was so empty (well, besides all the senior citizens of course). That is until we got to the checkout and they only had ONE lane open. And I don't think the clerk was very happy to be there.

I had been wondering what Cannon was going to do without Charlie around. He pretty much stuck by me all day. Occasionally, he would wander into Charlie's room looking for him. When he couldn't find him he would come find me again. Don't get me wrong. These two don't really play together (unless you count yelling and screaming at each other as playing). They still really don't even seem to like each other all that much. I am sure Cannon just noticed that he was missing, and probably wondering why he was stuck home with boring ol' mom.

We played, ate lunch, cleaned up a little bit and then got a special present ready for Charlie for when he got home. He has been saving for the lego beach house for a while and had about half saved, so I kicked in the other half to surprise him with it. Just a little gift to let him know how proud of him we are and reinforce what a special day it was.

Charlie was pretty quiet when we first picked him up. I expected that. He is usually an observer at first when he is put in a new situation. He told me he had a great time. They learned about math, had goldfish crackers for snack, he loved the spongebob stickers I put on his sandwich bag and it rained at recess. Those were the highlights. I asked him if he was excited to go back tomorrow and he said "What?? I get to go back tomorrow? Awesome!" Sigh. I am so glad to hear that.
And of course the lego surprise was a big hit. Now it is time to hit the sack so we can do it all over again tomorrow.

our preschool graduate.....

That's right, we have a preschool graduate in the Smith household. We were bummed to find out that we were going to be out of town for the graduation festivities, but Charlie did come home on his last day with this diploma. He also got some sidewalk chalk, bubbles and a pinwheel from his teacher. He was so stoked about all his new treasures.

A few weeks ago I had a meeting with his teacher to review the goals we had set when he started there. She said that he had made great progress with his social skills. He was playing with others without having to be asked and was rarely playing alone. He was also completing fine motor skill activities with little help and was able to stick with it for at least five minutes. He had completed the goals and will not be eligible for any special services next year in kindergarten. I was not surprised to hear this because I could see at home that his fine motor skills had really improved over the past few months. I have also seen him interacting more with kids at the playground and breaking out of his comfort zone. I was also not surprised to hear this because I don't think his teachers here ever really got why he needed help in the first place. The only reason he qualified for the program in Utah is because he was eligible in Idaho. From day one here, I have felt like the teachers thought I was completely crazy. I don't know, they just didn't seem to get it like the preschool in Idaho. I am thankful that his teacher here really did love Charlie and he had a great experience. He was bummed that school was out and is excited to start Kindergarten.

They also did some reading and mathematics testing. I am not sure why they did not do this when he started, but I didn't say much then. Our case worker in Idaho told me to disclose only the minimum and let them figure it out. I know the teacher figured out quickly that he was pretty bright, but she was quite shocked with his testing results. She said she had to ask him questions that she has never had to ask before because he just kept going. She said she was laughing because he kept saying how much fun it was. I let on that I did have some idea of what we are dealing with and explained that is why I have been pushing for the help he needed in the other areas. I did find out that Utah starts their gifted program in first grade (as opposed to the third grade in Idaho) so that is good news. If I think about all this for too long, I feel the anxiety creep in and I start to feel helpless and scared for the next few years. I just want him to get the education that he deserves and for him to love it too. Instead of panicking, I have just been praying. Praying for the path that lies before him, that all the right people are there to guide us right where he needs to be.

On another note, as I was taking the picture above Cannon came outside to see what was going on. He was not sure why Charlie was standing against the wall, but he was sure that he needed to do the same. Here he is behind the scenes, always toting his cup around in one arm and exploring with the other.

looking good at alta view.....

We had our first parent-teacher conference for Charlie at his new school on Thursday. His teacher (Ms. Gretchen) really didn't plan on meeting with us since he just started but I said I would love to hear how he is adjusting so far. We had set-up a few goals before he started so they would really know what to concentrate on during class. One was for his fine motor skills and sticking with a particular task that he doesn't want to do. These two go hand in hand for him because he easily gives up on the tasks that are hard for him. The other goal was to encourage more socializing with his peers. After he gets comfortable in a situation he usually withdraws a bit. We are still trying to figure this out. Does he start to realize that he is different and doesn't know how to fit in? Or would he just rather play alone? Or is it because he just isn't interested in most things that other kids his age are in to? We really don't know.

He is doing pretty well with his goals. He still needs a verbal reminder sometimes and sometimes he refuses to do it, but she said he is already making good progress. He is doing all the things that they expect kids to do prior to kindergarten and of course she was very impressed with his reading and math skills. She said that all the teachers have fallen in love with him and he has been quite popular with the other kids. He loves to do his daily assigned job and snack time is always the highlight of the day.

A few months ago I found that I was experiencing quite a bit of anxiety over Charlie's educational path. I just kept remembering the child psychologist's comment "Putting Charlie in kindergarten would be a disaster. He will be bored and he will begin to hate school." Because of the motor and social issues, I was finding myself so conflicted on what to do. I don't want him to be bored in kindergarten, but I really don't feel like he is ready for 1st grade either. Combine that with him being on the smaller side and the homeschool vs public school debate and I was feeling overwhelmed. Honestly, I am still feeling overwhelmed, but I don't feel the panic I did before. We have decided to take a wait and see approach. Start him in kindergarten and see how it goes. We have no idea what is going to happen and how he is going to adapt. I feel a peace with this decision. I feel like it is the right thing to do right now. It may change later, but we will deal with it then. Right now he is happy at school, he loves it and he is doing great. Yay for that!

back to school again....

After two and a half months, lots of paperwork and testing and many meetings with the school district, Charlie is finally starting preschool here in Utah. Before we moved we had Charlie evaluated to start attending the public preschool in Idaho due to his delay with his fine and gross motor skills. He loved that program and his teacher. It was the first time that he was begging to go. He really did not like the spanish immersion school he was attending previously so it was so great to see him so excited. He only got to attend Hunter Elementary for a week before we had to move. They said they would transfer over all his paperwork and it should be no problem getting him set up over here in Utah. Um, yeah right. Turns out we moved into a brand new school district and let's just say they are having a hard time getting things figured out. He finally got approved to start attending on Tuesday and Thursday mornings. He was tested by the school OT and she didn't think he needed any separate OT time(I have a lot to say about this OT, but I won't go on that tangent now), but they did establish some goals and they will be watching him closely to see how he does.

He was supposed to start last Tuesday but he had that nasty cold so he started on Thursday instead. Charlie was so excited that he got to go back to school and especially that he was going to get to ride the bus! He got ready that morning in record time and the anticipation of that yellow bus pulling up was just too much to handle. As the bus pulled up, he bolted for the door and didn't look back. I yelled goodbye to him and heard his sweet little voice yell goodbye back. I was so relieved that he was not scared. I was not quite as easy, just ask my parents. I am sure they still have nightmares about it.



And this guy? He was definitely wondering why we were standing outside in the cold staring out into the parking lot. He was even more confused when we had to go back inside without his big bro. He had a pretty big smile on his face when we saw that big yellow bus pull up a second time and he saw his favorite face again.

se habla espanol....

The doctor that completed Charlie's IQ tests suggested that we not take him back to the preschool he had been attending for a few reasons. Since he already knows most of the curriculum taught in most preschools, she really urged us to look for a preschool that was more play-based so he could learn that school is fun. I had a hard time finding a school that described themselves as play-based and the few schools that I did call had no interest in accepting Charlie and taking on a gifted child in their classroom. I had given up and decided to just enroll him in Kindermusik and The Little Gym so that he could still socialize and learn more about music and work on his gross motor skills. Eric on the other hand had been looking for Spanish classes in the area (for him to take)and he came across this Spanish immersion preschool. We made a visit to the school and talked to the teacher and decided that this would be the perfect place for Charlie. The teachers only speak Spanish during class. They also have a low teacher-student ratio and I loved their curriculum so we were sold on the idea.

As I heard all the talk about everybody going back to school, I was bummed that Charlie was going to miss out. I am so happy that we found this school and I hope that he loves it.

He had is first day today and was very excited to meet some new friends. The school is called Puentes Preschool. Charlie is usually very good at remembering a name or title of something, but he has trouble with this one and all weekend he kept asking when he was going to be able to go to Petunias Preschool. He had a great day, and as usual, the only thing he told me about the day was what they had for snack (lucky charm cookies, whatever those are!).