er visit #2.....

Cannon's vomiting has mostly just been limited to after he eats solid food now. Because of this he has pretty much been refusing to eat anything besides milk. He was pretty "off" yesterday, not much energy at all and he slept a lot. I put him to bed early and then at about 11:30 we heard this terrible cough. It was odd because he hadn't had a cough at all before then. I went to check on him and his face was bright red and he couldn't stop coughing. He then started to have a hard time breathing. After all that has been through lately, I did not even hesitate to just pack up his bag and head to the ER. Eric stayed home with Charlie. His cough got a little better on the way but he was still very uncomfortable and seemed to be in a lot of pain. We got right in to see a nurse and she said it sounded like croup. We got set up in a room and gave him a nebulizer breathing treatment as we waited for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and she was pretty sure it was croup as well because his lungs seemed clear and she could tell that his throat was quite swollen. I didn't know much about croup, but I guess it is an upper repiratory viral infection that has a distinct "barking-seal" cough. She wanted to get a chest x-ray to be sure it was not pneumonia. The chest x-ray did not show pneumonia, but that he had RSV along with the croup. My heart sank when she told me this because they used to talk a lot about RSV in the NICU and how life threatening it is for little babies. He was getting those monthly $1500 shots to help prevent RSV last winter. She told me that it should not be too serious for Cannon since he is bigger now and did not have any major lung problems. She said it will be just like a very,very bad cold that will last for 10-14 DAYS! That combined with the sore, swollen throat and occasional vomiting, sounds like it is going to be a fun couple of weeks. They gave him some steroids to help reduce the swelling in his throat. We are supposed to give him another dose of steroids tonight. He had to stick around for a while to be sure that the steroids kicked in and that he did not get any worse. The doctor was happy with his condition after about a half hour and we were able to go home. We all got back in to bed about 3am and he slept pretty good until 8. The only thing we can give him is tylenol to maybe help with the pain, but otherwise this is just something we are going to have to wait out.

I am tired and frustrated, but mostly I am just sad. Sad that he is not getting better. Sad that he won't eat. Sad to see him so sad. Sad that I feel like something is wrong, but yet we really do not have any answers. Please pray for us. Pray that he will have a quick recovery and that we can have our little dude back.

partying michael jackson style....

So, even though Charlie wanted to have a Mexican Fiesta for his party for months, he changed his mind and insisted on a Michael Jackson themed party. Just in case you were wondering, there are not a lot of MJ themed party decorations readily available. And the few things you do find are definitely not going to be child sized.

As I looked through the party store trying to get creative, I saw this life sized cardboard cutout of MJ himself. I knew that Charlie would freak out about it and it was only 19 dollars so I decided to skip the balloons and get it. Balloons only last a few days and I have a feeling this cutout is going to be sticking around for quite a while.

He LOVED it. He kept asking if I put that Happy Birthday sign on it. I told him no, that MJ knew it was his big day and wanted to send him birthday wishes. Then he said "I am pretty sure that Michael Jackson would not recognize me if I saw him in real life."

Anybody else think he looks a lot like Freddy Krueger with the striped sweater and hat? Eric and I were chuckling about it all day.

In the afternoon Eric took Charlie and his two buds, Brennan and Aidan, to a movie. Charlie picked Alvin and the Chipmunks The Squeakuel. (I really was not bummed that I had to miss that one!). When he went to pick up the boys they busted out the hats and white gloves that we got and got silly for the camera.

Then we headed to McDonald's for dinner, Charlie's choice of course! We enjoyed our delicious gourmet dinner and then did cake and presents (and since they have a Nothing Bundt Cakes store here in Sandy, you know that we were going to get one! Best cakes ever!) I tried to think of a way to decorate the cake to the theme, but everything just seemed too cheesy. Luckily, Charlie was too concerned about eating the frosting than the actual decoration.

He had a great day and he loved all his presents. He got some legos, Spongebob DVDs, the Meatball Madness game, the MJ This Is It DVD* and the Band Hero game for his Nintendo DS. Such a lucky little boy with lots of people that love him!

* The MJ This Is It DVD is not actually out yet, but he has been hinting ever since he saw it in the theater that he just has to have it and that they are offering it as a preorder at Amazon.com. He repeatedly told me about the preorder and then he would end it with "all I need is an e-mail address and a credit card number...." Yeah right dude, nice try!

Happy Birthday Charlie! We love you so much and are proud of the big boy that you are!

quick cannon update...

First, let me just say if you have never had to watch your child get an upper GI test, than be sure to thank your lucky stars because it is not good. Not good at all.

Second, Cannon is doing okay. I went in to get him this morning and he had vomited all over himself again. He didn't vomit all afternoon on Tuesday and then nothing on Wednesday so I was surprised to wake up to that smell again. Ugh. The results of his GI test were normal. I chatted with the doctor after she gave me the results and she thinks that we are still dealing with a viral illness that just won't go away. I said that I thought it was odd that he was having such long intervals in between vomiting episodes. She didn't really have an answer for that, but said that she wanted us to wait a few more days and if he isn't feeling better by Monday than she wants us to come in. I am pleased that the vomiting is not as frequent but he still will not eat any solids at all and he is pretty lethargic. He has been very quiet and is just laying around all the time. Definitely not his normal self.

We are happy to hear that they did not find any problems today. Hopefully the doctor is right and he just has a lingering viral illness and will be better by Monday. Would you continue to pray that he will feel better soon and if not, that God will give us some answers and heal Mr. Cannon. I hate to say it, but I am actually missing the fiesty little dude!

seriously?....

I was feeling pretty optimistic that things were on the mend.

Sigh.

Cannon slept pretty good but as I opened his door this morning I was immediately hit with a recognizable stench. Yep, it was vomit and it was in his hair and clothes, it was all over his bedding and crib and even some on the floor. I wanted to turn right around and climb back into bed and cry. I put him in the tub and got everything cleaned up and gave him about an ounce of Gatorade. He instantly threw that up too. I did all the clean-up once again, started a laundry pile out on the patio and got Cannon in outfit number two. I waited another hour or two and tried some Gatorade again. He did not throw up this time, but I could tell that some was coming back up and he was choking on it. Then he would cry because it was burning his throat. I had to call the doctor anyway to schedule his follow-up appointment this week and once I described the events of the last few weeks she said we should come in. After looking everything over she decided that we should have an upper GI test done to check for reflux. He was on reflux medicine on and off for a while but it never seemed to help much. She said it was possible that he may not have been on the correct dosage or that it may be more severe than we thought. If the test comes back that he does have reflux then we are going to get him on medicine right away and then get an appointment with a GI doctor to see if there is anything more serious happening. In the meantime, I am giving him some Gaviscon to help soothe the burning in his throat.

I have not seen so much vomit or done so much laundry in my entire life. Of course, that is not what really matters here. What matters is that I have to watch my little guy go through all of this pain and frustration. He has lost 1.5 pounds over the last six weeks. He now weighs what he did at his one-year appointment back in October. I also think that it is having some effect on his development. He is not necessarily behind, but he has not made much progress over this time either. I don't want something to be wrong with him, but if there is I am praying for some answers to come very soon. We could really use a break around here.

The great news through all of this is that I found out today that Cannon will qualify for Medicaid in Utah and the effective date will be from December 1, 2009. This is in addition to our current medical insurance. So, all the medical bills that he racked up last weekend and all the upcoming procedures will be covered and we will have no out of pocket expenses. That is a huge relief. It is already hard enough going through all of this but knowing that we won't have to figure out how to pay for it all make it much easier to take.

Thanks for all your sweet comments and e-mails. They have meant a lot to me and our family. Your love and support is what gets us through each day!

it is a good thing he is so cute......

I had intended for this post to be a holiday recap, but I guess I should know by now that my life does not ever seem to stick to my plan.

On Saturday I had to call 911 because my baby boy had a seizure right in front of my eyes. I had no idea what to do. I have always hoped that I would never have to call 911, especially because for one of my boys. But there I was, holding Cannon in my arms, his arms still twitching while I explained to the operator what had just happened. Tears were streaming down my face and I was in complete disbelief that this was actually happening.

I had set Cannon on the ground as I went to get him some milk. He knew what I was doing and was not happy that I put him down. He started to cry and went in to his typical breath holding pattern. This part was not new. In fact he does this almost daily. He holds his breath until he starts to turn blue and then he always comes back. Not this time. I picked him up to try to get him to start breathing. His eyes rolled to the back of his head and he began to seize. He had no color to his face, his eyes were half open and he just kept seizing. I had no idea what to do. I kept asking him to breath. I tried to keep talking to him in a calm voice but I was getting panicked. I was right by the patio so I took him outside thinking the cold air may help him snap out of it. Nothing was working. I grabbed my phone and briefly thought about calling Eric who was out getting the oil changed on the car. But what was he going to do? As I dialed the numbers 9-1-1 on the phone my heart was racing and I thought, really? Is this really happening? The operator told me what to do - lay him on his side, don't hold him down, etc. He finally stopped moving and he was calm. He lay in my arms quietly for a few moments and then he just began to scream. I sat on the phone with the operator as we waited for the paramedics to arrive. I just sobbed, wondering if he was okay. Did I do the right thing? Am I imagining this? The fire truck arrived first. Two firemen came in and we took his temperature right away. He did not have a fever. His vital signs were good but he was still quite upset and was still screaming. Then two paramedics arrived. All four men advised that Cannon be taken in the ambulance to Primary Children's Hospital. Just in case he had another seizure they could tend to him immediately. One of the firefighters helped Charlie get his shoes and jacket on. He was not phased by the events at all. He was telling them all about his Christmas presents and that his birthday was coming up and he was going to be five. I grabbed a jacket for Cannon and I and we headed out to the ambulance. Just as we got outside, Eric drove up. He had no idea what had just happened. He ran up to us and we gave him the details. He was going to follow us up to the hospital in his car. I asked if he could take Charlie, but he was already so excited to ride in the ambulance and they were cool with him coming with us. Cannon was still screaming as the paramedic tried to get some more information from me about his history and the event itself. It was about a half hour drive to the hospital. About halfway there Cannon fell asleep. The paramedic said it was common to crash like that since your body exerts an incredible amount of energy during a seizure. Charlie continued to talk about his favorite Nintendo games and Michael Jackson dance moves. The paramedic mentioned what a great kid he was. The second we got to the hospital Cannon woke up and began to scream. He continued to scream for the next 4 hours that we were at the ER. He was not happy about what just happened and definitely did not want to be in the hospital surrounded by strangers poking at him. We waited for what felt like an eternity. Eric and I took turns holding Cannon trying to get him to calm down and drink some Gatorade. (As a side note to all this, Cannon had been sick in the few days prior to this. He had been vomiting and was having trouble staying hydrated.) The doctor finally came in and asked a lot of questions about his history and the events of the day. He was pretty convinced that the seizure was related to his breath holding. He looked completely healthy otherwise and he had no other concerns. Really? All this because Cannon likes to hold his breath until he turns blue? I had heard of kids passing out, but not having a seizure. He basically told us to stay aware of this tendency and just try to avoid situations where he would hold his breath. Easy, right? Like I said before, this is pretty much a daily occurrence. The doctor just chuckled a little and gave us the spiel about every kid having a different temperament and how what works for one won't always work for another. He really was not much help. He did order some blood tests and an EKG just to be sure. He said sometimes seizures can be caused by iron deficiency. Cannon really got ticked when they covered his chests with leads for the EKG. They actually had to leave the room in hopes that he would calm down because they could not do the test with him that upset. He finally calmed down and they finished the test and took some blood. We waited for another 45 minutes to get the results. The doctor came back in to let us know the tests were completely normal and sent us on our way. Cannon actually stayed awake the entire ride home. He was not crying but just looking out the window at all the lights, acting like we had just had a normal day. He had some Gatorade when we got home. It was just about his bedtime and he was out for the night. Eric and I chatted for a little while and then we watched some mindless TV trying to calm down. We were exhausted and went to bed early but unfortunately spent most of the night tossing and turning. Cannon has been doing great since then. He is drinking a lot of milk but is slowly warming up to solid food.

He held his breath again today. He had a little spit-up and it sent him into his normal routine. He started to change color and I stayed calm. I have been praying that I will keep calm. That I will not have flashbacks of his colorless face and his twitching body when he has these breath holding moments. I am so grateful that God helped me through it today and I know he will continue to do so when and if it happens again.

We never want to experience days like this, but if we didn't we would not be able to experience all the good things that happened as well. The friends that dropped what they were doing in an instant to help out. The family and friends that prayed for us all day long and comforted us in our sorrow. The amazing emergency workers that were so kind to my two boys and comforted me when I felt like a complete idiot. The incredible care we received from the nurses at the Children's hospital. At the end of the day, I felt loved. My family was loved. And really, what more could I ask for?

Like I said before, it sure is a good thing he is so cute.

christmas card photo shoot 2009....

This was supposed to be a family photo shoot, but the boys were sick on the original date we had planned for it and then we couldn't find another date that worked with Eric's work schedule and the photographer. It would have been nice to get all four of us - maybe next year! It was hard to get a very good shot of the boys together. Cannon was not interested in smiling and once we finally got him around to it, Charlie was usually completely distracted by something else. Also, Cannon couldn't stand by himself so it limited our options. When I got home and told Eric how things went, Eric said to me "You really didn't think it was going to go any differently did you?" Hmmmph. I guess not.



Look at Cannon's face on this one...looks like he is having a blast, right?








This one makes me tear up. I love it.


Okay, looks like we are done....
And the final choice

while i was away...

Hello?




Anybody there?




It obviously has been a while since I updated. Here are a few things we have been up to over the last month or so:

- All 4 of us were very sick. Charlie started it all, then I got it and then Eric and Cannon followed. Eric and I both had sinus infections, I had an ear infection, Eric had strep throat and Cannon got his first ear infection in both ears. Lots of antibiotics were given out around here.

- I had a booth at our community Holiday Bazaar. I had just baby items including appliqued onesies, burp rags and quilts. The onesies and burp rags did pretty well, but I only sold one quilt. I guess they were just more than people wanted to spend, but at $30, they really are a steal. If anybody is needing a cute shower gift, let me know! :)

- We moved to Utah! I made a trip a few days before Thanksgiving to meet up with Eric and look at apartments. My mom and dad watched Cannon for us which was such a huge help. We found a place that we like (you know, for an apartment at least!) and then Eric, Charlie and I drove back to Idaho on Thanksgiving day to pack up all our stuff. Our parents all came together and prepared a delicious Thanksgiving dinner that was waiting for us as we arrived. Friday morning we loaded up the Uhaul and got out of town. We had to be to SLC by 6:00pm to get the keys to our apartment. We rolled into the parking lot around 5:30. The only people we know here were out of town so Eric had to unpack the truck all by himself while I kept the kids out of the way. The truck was unpacked and we had the beds ready to go by bedtime. We spent the rest of the weekend unpacking boxes and getting reacquainted with all of our stuff that had been in storage for the last year. -I changed Cannon's carseat to forward facing for the trip. I was planning on keeping him rear facing for much longer, but he really likes it...I don't really have the heart to move him back.
-Cannon has had a rough month. It all started with teething, then the cold/ear infection mentioned above, then back to teething and now he has some sort of stomach bug I think. He was throwing up all day yesterday. After getting throw up in my hair, changing his clothes 4 times and doing 9 loads of laundry, I was ready for the day to be a distant memory!

- Charlie wrote his first letter to Santa. His list included a Nintendo DS, and toy ATM machine and the game Lego Rockband. His list keeps changing and of course keeps getting longer by the day.
- The boys are sharing a room for the first time and it has been a rough transition. I don't think the sickness they have had has helped, but they just love to wake each other up. Of course once Cannon is up, he just cries and then that makes Charlie upset. Needless to say, Charlie has spent some nights on the couch. He has even been asking to sleep on the couch so he doesn't have to hear Cannon. I am really hoping that this gets better soon.
- We went with the Hoolahan's to see the Christmas lights at Thanksgiving Point. You drive through and look at the lights and then at the end you can visit with the reindeer. Cannon really liked looking at the lights.
I just like this one because Charlie looks like a ghost.
Charlie wanted nothing to do with the reindeer. He was just sure one of them was going to poke his head through and bite his hand off. Eric finally talked him into getting a little bit closer, but just for a second.

-We put up our Christmas tree. Cannon is surprisingly uninterested in it. We put it up later than usual because I didn't want to be fighting him, but he really doesn't care about it. He is always surprising me! He helped to put on the first ornament.

Once we were done they just wanted to lay under it and rub their faces on the soft tree skirt. My 2 little sensory boys.
We tried to get some pictures of the boys together by the decorated tree but it was not happening. Cannon was DONE. Charlie was up for a few pictures...only because I bribed him with a candy cane.

- We went to the local mall to visit Santa. I will post that picture later because I have to scan it in, but after the santa visit GPa, Charlie and Cannon took a ride on the train around the mall. The boys loved it. My dad said Cannon had a ball waving at everybody with both hands as they rode by.

- The December kit at Freehand Scraps went live on the 1st. With the move I was unable to complete anything for the gallery, but check out the other girl's work. It is a very cute kit!